from pizza to nothing :)

my poor, poor wani is saddened by recent developments. since pluto has been stripped of its planetary status, he has come to the conclusion that his forever "codigo" for the nine planets will undergo a major overhaul.

from My Very Eager Mother Just Sent Us Nine Pizzas, it's now My Very Eager Mother Just Sent Us NOTHING. hehehe

goodbye pluto! you were such a big part of my science struggle in grade school and i will miss you soooo much :)

a different perspective

(1981) barely two seconds into this world, i broke all records in bugshan general hospital. i was born dead, revived after 15 minutes, and spent the first 6 months of my life in an incubator.

(1988) seven years later, on a boat trip to iloilo with 15 of my relatives, strangers asked me to sing and dance on the boat deck. thinking i was spectacularly talented (which i later discovered to be false), i obliged. after two hours, i was puking like crazy and fighting for every breath. tito boy, my mom's cousin and the ship's captain, amazingly sped up the remaining 5 hours of the trip into just 2 hours. even before all passengers were allowed to disembark, me and my sobbing mother were whisked to the cargo area straight into a waiting ambulance. i arrived in the hospital white as ash, without a pulse.

(2001) thirteen years later, my mom died after being in comatose for 8 months.

(2004) three years later, my dad and stepmom got into an accident which took the life of my stepmom and robbed my dad of his normal life.

(2005) a year later, my sister's pregnancy was, according to her doctor, not "easy". as it turns out, she was too small for the big, beautiful baby in her tummy. it took her 8 hours of labor. she slept for 40 hours straight after delivery.

and that's why i hate hospitals, with doctors in their pristine white coats randomly explaining what's wrong with your pancreas or your expanding heart. why is it that explaining to patients have become so robotic? like somthing straight from those big books they lugged around as students. these patients are also normal people with their own dreams, fighting to make it through another day.

fortunately for me, i have the best doctor, explaining what's wrong with me in "angel terms". no scientific brouhaha. so if ever i'm asked about whatever shit i'm going through right now, i can expertly explain it in tom and jerry terms, which is the example he used.

after much reflection last night, i'm not afraid anymore. i have lived a very happy life. and i'm so grateful that vond is here to hold my hand everytime i have my doubts. my firends have been great and i feel that to ask for more would simply be ungrateful to Him.

i've also made a strangely funny realization last night. before, i was so afraid of losing my mom or my dad because i might not see them again. this time, i'm afraid of losing me, not because i have grand plans to accomplish but because in this case, i actually lose everyone. nobody is leaving me. but if i'm the one doing the leaving, then i won't get to see anyone anymore. does that make sense? well, the good thing is that this thought keeps me fighting, keeping me from screaming my lungs out during treatment. it makes me braver, i think, knowing i would definitely want to be there to see my sister's babies go to school, be a pain in the ass to their girlfriends/boyfriends, spoil them and just be the best tita ninang ganda in the world. it makes me stronger knowing i would want to grow old with vond, spending our weekends by the beach and living off his savings (since i have long come to terms with the fact that i'll never save a penny, hehehe)

good vibes, really. how can pink walls NOT be a good sign

girls night in :)

so who said only night outs can be fun?

this... this is what happens when four crazies get locked up in a pink room...

crazies! :)

messing with the effects of my baby mac "artemis"!

porshee the starlet, hehehe

ehem, the beautiful amoeba!